Dick Leaves a Funny Taste In My Mouth. or Why I Don't Swear Except in Print.

When I was a kid, my dad cursed like a sailor. But like any good dad would, he insisted that my sister and I not use such language. I know that most people have a similar story to tell. Parents are great at the old "do as I say not as I do" routine. For some reason though, with me it actually took. I will admit that I did try to swear once. I didn't like it. It just didn't feel right on my tongue. That's ironic now that I think about it, since I do have a bad case of Scrotal Tongue.

Lately I have noticed that when I am writing/typing, many of the Seven Words You Can't Say On TV come flowing right out of my fingertips. For some reason I can't quite figure out this doesn't bother my delicate sensibilities at all. Words that I have never actually uttered feel right at home when I write. The really weird thing is that when I go about my day I don't even THINK swear words. It's just not me. Put a keyboard in front of me though and out comes the filth!! I am probably exaggerating, I'm not exactly writing about anal rape with a rusty cheese grater. Still, the occasional fuck does show up. That seems to be my fingers' vulgarity of choice. I think because it's so versatile. Noun, verb, adjective, and metaphorical conjunction.

It all does make me wonder though, which me is the Real Me? When I speak, I don't feel like I am holding anything back. When I really get into my head to write something though, there is a lot of fucking weirdness in there. Not saying all those naughty things out loud does give me a little sense of control though. As long as I can maintain my composure and control what I am saying I must be all good. Right? I'm pretty sure I need some therapy! I think I will go on line and play some video games instead.

PS: Shit and Damn!